Paper Marriage is under strict observation abroad
Saturday, 27 July 2013
A lot of young men go crazy for going abroad in order to
earn their living. No doubt, economic recession in the country, devaluation of
local currency, and increasing unemployment in Pakistan are some of the
monsters that compel our young lot to think of going abroad. Their relatives and
friends abroad intensify their desire with their show off of wealth on their
visit to Pakistan and a deep feel of inferiority and being let down overwhelms them and they
long for flying to US and other European countries where, they think, rivers of
dollars and pounds flow and heavens are waiting for them.
Labels: Marriage, Pakistan, Paper Marriage
posted @ 08:16,
,
Marriage Rituals and Islam
Friday, 26 July 2013
A politician in Bahawalnagar district wedded recently and
the barat was demanded to come by helicopter. The bride desired to go to her
husband’s place in a helicopter. Desires are the signs of life and they should
exist in our daily life otherwise life will be a blank paper. But these wishes
and desires should not be at the cost of others. Desire of bringing barat on a
helicopter may lead to a trend or the other brides of the area can also demand
the same on their marriage. Where will the trend go if this practice goes on?
What if someone is
Labels: Islam, Marriage, Wedding Rituals
posted @ 05:43,
,
Eid Bazaars and ladies shopping
Wednesday, 24 July 2013
Eid ul Fitr is in the wake and excitement of girls and
ladies goes on increasing in spite of the hot and humid weather. They have
started visiting boutiques, cloth depots, shoes brands and jewelry shops. Mehndi
is another festivity that is favorite on Eid and without which Eid is not considered
perfect. Special Mehndi stalls on Eid
are the temporary beauty of Eid bazaars skilled people are hired to apply
Mehndi on the hands of girls. Bangles are another must and shops have an extended
item of Eid. After Eid, wedding season
is coming up, so the ladies are shopping for two events.
Other Eid accessories consist of home decor, children items,
food items, make up, and what not. These bazaars are prelude to Eid and
marriages after Eid. So the rush in these bazaars and markets is justifiable. These preludes offer complete shopping packages
at one place and aim at pleasing the customers with the best they can have for
them.
Labels: Eid Bazaars, Marriage, Shopping, Wedding
posted @ 12:46,
,
Where are the Perfect Matches?
Sunday, 21 July 2013
According to an estimate, 10 million girls are unmarried in
Pakistan and their parents are waiting for the suitable matches for them. Every
rising day they start waiting for someone to select them as their life partners and every sunset brings news of ‘no one came’. Disappointments and depression overwhelm
them and different psychological problems appear in their life. Parents blame
themselves to have daughters and the girls allege themselves to be born as
girls. High standards of our society and double standards of the parents of
boys contribute to a massive number of these unmarried girls. Why are parents
of boys not empathetic towards the family of girls? They seek for a daughter-in-law
resembling moon irrespective of appearance and look of their son.
Out of the main reasons of this gigantic number, there is a
tendency of impressing others with the selection of superb daughter-in-law. Relatives
and friends are the audience of this show off who are feared to make fool if
daughter-in-law is not extremely beautiful, smart and cool.
Dowry is the other main reason of this issue. Those who are
not financially strong are doomed to suffer like this. They do not have money
to buy cars, heavy machinery, plots, and house to their daughter in dowry. And the
result is the daughters turn gray-headed at home of parents. Marriage is a bargain in other words.
Appearance is the only criterion to select a girl as life
partner. It means those who have not been born with so-called beauty, will not
find matches. girls with less height or with any physical problem are denied to get selected as life partners.
Labels: Marriage, Match Making, Perfect Match
posted @ 14:20,
,
Match Making in Rural Areas of Pakistan
Sunday, 14 July 2013
It would not be wrong to say that Pakistan is a land of rituals, festivals, and celebrations.It is the land of thousand faces, a country simply overflowing with cultural richness. Whatever the preferences, a wedding in Pakistan is good display of customs, traditions, many of which are heavily influenced by foreign customs. Marriage is an important social celebration and people participate with passion and enthusiasm. The rites are imbued with a certain sentiment appeal. And they are considered a must in functions and jubilation.
Demographically, Pakistan is divided in rural hinterland and urban areas. Common among marriages in rural and urban areas are Mangnee, Mayoon, Mehndi, Nikah, Valima and living happily ever after. But the way these colorful rituals are performed greatly vary.
Rural areas of Pakistan still remain a largely conservative society, where many young people shy away when it comes to marriages. Exceptions apart, arranged marriages are a cornerstone of rural society. It remains the responsibility of parents and marriages are mostly among people within the same tribe, caste, community, family or locality.
This is what happens in rural areas with some minor changes from place to place: After initial understanding and covert messages between families of prospective spouses, the boy's relatives visit the girl's family and offer the proposal, on formal acceptance the "mangni" (engagement) takes place, marriage date is fixed, groom, with friends and relatives goes to the house of the bride in the form of barat (marriage procession) where the nikah (social contact) is performed. The consent of the bride and the groom to the marriage (ijab and qabool) in the presence of at least two witnesses is obtained to solemnize the contract as per the commandment of divine Islam. Guests are served with sumptuous food (notwithstanding what the law of the land says about the feast). Groom brings home his the bride. This is followed by Walima. Life goes on . . .
Moreover, on the arrival of barat, the dowry is displayed for every one to see and at the same place groom's female relatives show what they have gifted (jewelry and clothing) to the bride. Both sides glorify the gifts. Paradoxically, in Punjab, a night earlier than the marriage date, groom visits homes of his friends and relatives where he is offered money. Other gifts mostly in the form of money (salami) or garlands made of currency notes are presented when groom gets ready for going to bride's home. Customarily, groom dresses up in attire presented to him by one of his sisters and in return, he gives to his sister(s) what she demands. There are no marriage halls and the congregations take place in homes and or community centres (called Daras). There are no caterers. Local tradesmen prepare food and serve.
As per the available statistics, divorce rate in the rustic areas is comparatively lower. The core joint family system is still in tact and that is one of the reasons for low divorce rate. At the other hand, marriages at very young age, consanguineous marriages, marriages without consent of the partners and cross marriages are common. And they are one way or the other successful due to the family set ups and involvement of elders who are the main deciding authority over there even today..
Labels: Marriage, Rituals in Marriage, Rural Marriages
posted @ 12:18,
,
Stop Child Marriage
Saturday, 13 July 2013
She was 10 and half years old when she was told one day that
the next day she will leave the home of her parents because her father has
given her to another tribe as wife of a man who was in his late 60s. The news
was not completely understood by the girl but the news of leaving her home was
shocking for her and she started crying. No tear knocked any door of the hearts
of parents, relatives, or any all others around called humans. And she was
dragged to the new home with her husband who was elder even than his father.
Yes it was a marriage. The wealthy father had paid a heavy price of a life and a
greedy or poor father sold himself in the market. Bride was less than eleven
and bridegroom was more than 60. What a couple they made! Religion, ethics, medical
facts…….all stayed deaf and dumb and a happy marriage took place in the far off
village.
It is happening even today in those areas where there are no
roads to take media and their news reporters or cameras. Since the news is of a
wealthy or influential people of society, it is generally not allowed to travel
on the wings of media. No reporting, no action, and even no listening of the affected
child are those social ills that scream of instant help and redemption. NGOs and government bodies need a joint
venture to not only stop this cruel action but they need to ‘infiltrate’
education into these minds who are the godfathers of such rural areas.
Labels: Child Marriage, Marriage
posted @ 06:01,
,
Understanding of Relations resolves Post-Marriage Issues
Friday, 12 July 2013
It is a general observation that parents are found cursing their sons who have changed after their marriage. Daughter-in-law is generally blamed of getting their son converted to merely a husband rather than a son and brother. Apart from individual examples which are not more than a few, problems generally lied underneath the lack of understanding the sensitive nature of relation that grow more touchy after marriage. Two families come into contact and if the both are not kept and maintained in a balanced way, relations get deteriorated and the climax sometimes reaches the peak point of divorce. Post-marriage issues at home are sometimes really pathetic.scenes at home are sometimes really pathetic.
Weighing both sides in an equal way is the key to the respectful and reasonable solution of all post-marriage issues at home. When there is an equilibrium between wife and the parental side, generally complaints of the both die out and husband comes up successful. The crux of the matter is that parents feel themselves insecure after their daughter-in-law reaches home whereas, daughter-in-law takes them as enemies or adversaries whose mission is to undermine the character of the former. Proper division of time and attention to both and discussing their complaints as a family is the key to peaceful solutions. Due to lack of education, our ladies are house wives who are less patient to the other party at home. The need is to put the both at their proper place avoiding any tilt.
Labels: Marriage, Post marriage Issues, Relations
posted @ 12:39,
,
Post-Marriage Issues are equally important to consider
Sunday, 7 July 2013
This is the story of those days when a few years pass after marriage. The bliss and charm of marital life is over and ground realities stand up from all sides. Economic issues, domestic crisis, and family involvement breeds tensions and frustrations in the minds of the couple and they start living like strangers while being under one roof. Life becomes tough, days and nights are heavier and a happy life turns to a burden. But there is no issue that cannot be sorted out. With a slight understanding and cooperation, home can be converted to a happy home again.
Share your tensions with your life partner
Most of our domestic problems arise when we do not share our problems with our life partner. Wife demands and husband is supposed to meet all those demands without being noticed that he is in financial trouble. If he takes his wife into confidence and budgets his household, many unnecessary expenses can be subtracted from daily and monthly register.
Do not cheat or lie
Cheating is the climax of relations whereas telling lies are the beginning points to kill a happy life. Try to be truthful to your life partner. It can save you from many troubles.
Trust each other
Trust is the key to healthy relation between a couple. Sceptical attitude and questioning kills the peaceful environment of home.
Recognise the work of your spouse
Generally, our ladies are house wives and they keep themselves busy in household all the day but husbands do not recognise their contribution to successful running of home. A little recognition can resolve many issues at home.
Labels: Issues, Marriage, Post Marriage
posted @ 10:27,
,
Arrange Vs Love Marriage: Two aspects
Sunday, 23 June 2013
The modern age and latest technologies have given birth to new needs. Changing environment has affected household affairs and matrimony is one of the biggest issues of our age. Now parents do not drag their feet to find a suitable match for their son or daughter. Instead, the youngsters select their life partners during studies or on social media. Chats on social media and mobile contacts generally lead to meetings which result in the wedding of the both. Such decisions are generally based on emotional wave and both the boy and girl fly in the air of fantasy but as soon as they come down to the world of reality, they come to know that the phase of fantasy is over. Bitter realities snake up from all around and mutual quarrels arise and trivial issues at home turn disputes.
Parents generally keep themselves aloof from all this scenario on the excuse that they had not their will in the marriage and now they were not responsible. So no elderly support is available and the ultimate end of story reaches a sad climax destroying the couple and if they have kids, these little souls suffer the most.
Read more »Labels: Marriage, Partner, Trends
posted @ 10:20,
,
Find a Perfect Life Partner with Aasmanirishtay
Monday, 17 June 2013
Life is a series of different experiences under different situations. It is a deep bliss of love and loyalty which we want to share with someone. We want to have good time with someone who is near to our heart, listens to our beats and hears what we want to say. And at times we find ourselves in a state when are in dire need of someone who understands and accompanies us no matter what happens with us in life. Such a great life partner is really a blessing by
Allah.
Those who have got their partners, are lucky and those who are in search of a partner, who matches the colour of their dreams, are thinking on their perfect match.Isn't it so? We have felt the pulse of the changing world and increasing problem of finding proper matches for girls and boys both have driven us to make a platform to address this issue. Here we will collect data from our valued members and their families and make the both parties mutually decide about their decision of marriage. You can trust us and we would answer your trust with our sincere efforts on line to find a perfect and ideal match for you.
Labels: Aasmanirishtay, Marriage, Wedding
posted @ 10:50,
,
