Match Making in Rural Areas of Pakistan
Sunday 14 July 2013
It would not be wrong to say that Pakistan is a land of rituals, festivals, and celebrations.It is the land of thousand faces, a country simply overflowing with cultural richness. Whatever the preferences, a wedding in Pakistan is good display of customs, traditions, many of which are heavily influenced by foreign customs. Marriage is an important social celebration and people participate with passion and enthusiasm. The rites are imbued with a certain sentiment appeal. And they are considered a must in functions and jubilation.
Demographically, Pakistan is divided in rural hinterland and urban areas. Common among marriages in rural and urban areas are Mangnee, Mayoon, Mehndi, Nikah, Valima and living happily ever after. But the way these colorful rituals are performed greatly vary.
Rural areas of Pakistan still remain a largely conservative society, where many young people shy away when it comes to marriages. Exceptions apart, arranged marriages are a cornerstone of rural society. It remains the responsibility of parents and marriages are mostly among people within the same tribe, caste, community, family or locality.
This is what happens in rural areas with some minor changes from place to place: After initial understanding and covert messages between families of prospective spouses, the boy's relatives visit the girl's family and offer the proposal, on formal acceptance the "mangni" (engagement) takes place, marriage date is fixed, groom, with friends and relatives goes to the house of the bride in the form of barat (marriage procession) where the nikah (social contact) is performed. The consent of the bride and the groom to the marriage (ijab and qabool) in the presence of at least two witnesses is obtained to solemnize the contract as per the commandment of divine Islam. Guests are served with sumptuous food (notwithstanding what the law of the land says about the feast). Groom brings home his the bride. This is followed by Walima. Life goes on . . .
Moreover, on the arrival of barat, the dowry is displayed for every one to see and at the same place groom's female relatives show what they have gifted (jewelry and clothing) to the bride. Both sides glorify the gifts. Paradoxically, in Punjab, a night earlier than the marriage date, groom visits homes of his friends and relatives where he is offered money. Other gifts mostly in the form of money (salami) or garlands made of currency notes are presented when groom gets ready for going to bride's home. Customarily, groom dresses up in attire presented to him by one of his sisters and in return, he gives to his sister(s) what she demands. There are no marriage halls and the congregations take place in homes and or community centres (called Daras). There are no caterers. Local tradesmen prepare food and serve.
As per the available statistics, divorce rate in the rustic areas is comparatively lower. The core joint family system is still in tact and that is one of the reasons for low divorce rate. At the other hand, marriages at very young age, consanguineous marriages, marriages without consent of the partners and cross marriages are common. And they are one way or the other successful due to the family set ups and involvement of elders who are the main deciding authority over there even today..
Labels: Marriage, Rituals in Marriage, Rural Marriages
posted @ 12:18,
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